Posts Tagged ‘Debbie Rochon’

Movie Reviews 297 – Won Ton Baby! (2011)

April 28, 2017

Madam Won Ton has a secret. Her idle-minded daughter Little Wing (Suzi Lorraine) who speaks only in baby-talk Chinese is not of Chinese descent at all but the result of a drug and alcohol fueled night of tomfoolery with a doped up, sweat suit wearing, Elvis impersonator who wears his flamboyant gold rimmed sunglasses to bed. In a role that only Scream Queen Debbie Rochon has the thespian acumen to make believable, Madam Won Ton, a former brothel Madam tries to keep her Chinese restaurant afloat, while drinking away her past life and her current problems.

One of those problems is the enormous growth on her pregnant  looking daughter’s abdomen as she clumsily waitresses in the restaurant, continually expressing “So solly. Me so solly.” as she drops food and drinks on the customers. When Little Wing suddenly feels pangs of pain and is brought to the hospital doctors determine that her protruding glob is a living parasitic twin which they excise and hand over to her with revulsion. Little Wing adopts her ‘brother’ as her own, oblivious to the trailing, dexterous umbilical cord and clawed hands. Sporting a shambling Elvis hairdo, the puppet like Won Ton Baby! monstrosity begins speaking within two days and starts hunting mice on the third. Then the bodies start piling up.

While Madam Won Ton charms the detective on the case (Lou Martini Jr.) her son Ben, a Jet Li wannabe, philosophically waxes Chinese ideology between hits of weed. In the meantime we get to see Baby jacking off to soft-core porn, smoke a few doobies himself and eventually having an unholy union with a drunk girl.

Undeniably twisted, this tale (co-written by “Little Wing” Lorraine) has us guessing what the baby will be like from the moment the camera zooms in on the bedside pill bottle with the “Risk of Birth Defects” warning. But no warning could be strong enough for the story that unfolds that includes scenes with “The King” in a sumo thong. It’s a poor man’s It’s Alive which includes Baby P.O.V. crawls and kills and a cameo by Leatherface himself, the late Gunnar Hansen.

Watch this one but I have to add one last warning. You don’t want to know what some of those cooks really serve as Chinese food in restaurants and the answer has nothing to do with the baby.


Movie Reviews 122 – [DVG] Dead and Rotting (2002)

June 15, 2013

Continuing with the reviews of the Demons, Vampires and Ghouls DVD set:

Dead and Rotting (2002)

Dead and RottingThree beer guzzling buddies are goofing around when one of the group is dared to go to the reputed neighborhood witch house. It’s all good fun until the boys run have a run in with the witch’s son at the local bar while the crazy coot is lapping up his bowl of milk. Anyhow, one thing leads to another and the three guys hire the two local junkies to scare up the witch’s house believing they themselves won’t be blamed as the junkies take the fall. But the junkies end up killing the witch’s cat/son (I did say he was lapping milk in a bar and there is hell to pay as the witch goes after both the junkies and the three guys.

The good news for viewers is that it is at this point the scraggy old witch turns into the a young voluptuous gal in order to seduce the boys. And seeing that Debbie Rochon plays the part (even with a few scant seconds of boobage) makes it all worthwhile. You gotta love it when the punishment consists of doing the nasty with Debbie, again and again. At one point one of the boys is just too pooped to continue and comes downstairs to pass her onto the next fellow. Of course they end up paying for this at one point, but it’s hardly punishment at first.

Once again  the acting is pretty solid for the entire cast which makes this one of the better Tempe films out there. The gags and jokes aren’t bad either. The witch effects are decent although I couldn’t quite figure out the “Pumpkin” guys she conjure up. Are they supposed to be just helping hands or are they supposed to be the receptacles for the victims? Whatever. You’ll enjoy this one.

Movie Reviews 121 – [DVG] Witchouse 3: Demon Fire (2001)

June 13, 2013

Continuing with the reviews of the Demons, Vampires and Ghouls DVD set:

Witchouse 3: Demon Fire (2001)

Witchouse 3 Demon FireDebbie Rochon sealed it for me, and she pretty much carries this J. R. Bookwalter written and directed movie on her shoulders about a girl named Annie (Tanya Dempsey) splitting up from her boyfriend and seeking sanctuary with two old friends, Stevie (Rochon) and Rose (Tina Krause). Annie finds her friends videotaping some weird ritual with fake blood and a knife, but Stevie and Rose convince her it’s all just for laughs when Annie first questions them.

The giggly antics (and I do mean giggly in the best boobastic sense with these girls) continue and the next day all three decide to film a fully scripted ritual, complete with pendragon and candles and end up conjuring some sort of witch. From that point on we get the occasional mysteriously appearing “Witches Burn!!” message written in blood and all the girls questioning and confronting one another almost like a ‘whodunit’ type mystery.

The entire minimal cast comes through in shinning colors including Annie’s boyfriend who’s another prime suspect. Horror hounds will also be familiar with Scream Queen Brinke Stevens, but she adorns the evil witch garb and makeup so she is practically indistinguishable in her role. It got kind of hokey at the very  end once all the facts are laid out on the table, but getting there was pretty fun.